It's nearly the end of the week, and as you see this or that person for the final time before the weekend, you get the question. "So, what are you up to this weekend?" Arrgghh!!!

Now, depending on who asks the question and how it's delivered, a few things go through my mind. Firstly, are they just asking me because they have something fabulous to do and are waiting to tell me about it? Are they trying to weekend-shame me?

Then, I feel pressured to make plans. Do I have something interesting or socially acceptable planned for the weekend? Should I jazz up a couple of things I can remember I'm doing to make my life sound more interesting? For example, "I'm creating a nook at home to make it into a relaxation sanctuary," a.k.a. tidying up your lounge room. Or, "I'm having a spa day", a.k.a taking a bath and washing my hair.

Occasionally, I have super exciting plans, but sometimes, my plans are private. I don't feel comfortable announcing these activities, especially if they involve personal matters or I simply prefer not to share. "Oh, yes, I am preparing for my colonoscopy this weekend. So, what I have to do is..."

At times, it's just awkward. If I have no acceptable plans, I can feel the need to justify my lack of activities, which can be uncomfortable for both parties. But the question also assumes that you have free time, where the reality may be that you have caring responsibilities or will be like many of our workforce and working.

I've been pondering what would be a better question. I am test-driving more general questions that show genuine interest in the person's life or well-being, such as "How do you like to spend your weekends?" or "What do you enjoy doing in your free time?" rather than attempting to pin down their exact movements over the next couple of days like some hostile interrogation or a border guard. "So, where exactly will you be staying? How long for? Who are you travelling with? What's the purpose of your visit?"

It also worried me that we must prioritise "doing" over "being" on the weekend. If it's not filled with adventures and activities, we can feel like we are getting it wrong. We turn each weekend into a project - work-ifying another part of our lives.

So, how do you answer this question if it makes you uncomfortable? Here are a few ways to handle it gracefully without feeling pressured to share more than you're comfortable with:

Give a general or slightly vague response. "I have a few things to take care of, but I'm also looking forward to some downtime."

Shift the focus from you to them. They may be itching to share rather than hear from you. "I'm not quite sure yet, still figuring it out. What about you? Any interesting plans?"

Highlight your need for self-care. "I plan to take it easy and enjoy some much-needed relaxation."

Express your enthusiasm for staying flexible. "I love having unplanned weekends—it leaves room for spontaneity!"

Mention a broad activity category. "I'm planning to catch up on some chores and maybe dive into a good book or a movie."

Sharing is caring, but don't feel you must reveal things you want to keep to - or for - yourself. And whatever you do in your free time can be whatever you want it to be - even if that's not doing anything.

Have a nice weekend